You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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