Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
