And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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