Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
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