question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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