The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
