Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Randomize
