Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
