we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
pop tarts are not kleenex
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
