Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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