Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
