can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Randomize
