No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Do vagina's smell?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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