Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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