You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
