What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
