I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
