I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
