dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
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