maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
