I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Randomize