I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
wat bout pragnant strippers??
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
