I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
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