He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
even my farts smell like vagina
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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