I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Found your dick twin last night
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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