is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
