3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
