He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
