just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
