I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
