but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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