well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
