I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
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