its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
