i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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