Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
i want to fuck
it's pretty self explanatory
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
