Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Randomize
