i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
We are all done wearing pants today
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize