we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
