I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
