Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
