Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
