yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
So many bounce houses so little time
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
