im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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