Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
