so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
