Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
