you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
