a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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