covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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