can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
